Finding ‘You’ again – Identity shifts in menopause

With Clinical Psychologist Dr Momotaj Islam

Menopause is a major life change that can really shake up a woman's sense of self. With all the hormonal, physical, and emotional shifts happening, it's no wonder many women find themselves rethinking who they are and what roles they play. Understanding these changes and finding ways to manage them can help women embrace this stage with confidence and clarity.

Understanding Identity Shifts

Identity is all about how we see ourselves, our purpose, and the roles we play in life. It's not fixed; it evolves with life's transitions, like menopause. This period can be unsettling due to hormonal changes and symptoms like hot flushes, weight gain, and mood swings, which can affect self-esteem and body image. Dr Momotaj noted, "when you have menopausal symptoms like hot flushes, weight gain, sleep problems, and changes to your skin and hair, that negatively impacts your self-esteem and your body image."

Societal Perceptions and Ageing

Society's views on ageing, especially for women, can make things tougher. Gendered ageism often results in women being judged more harshly than men as they age, with societal value placed on youth and physical attractiveness. This can impact self-worth and lead to a sense of loss as women navigate midlife. "There's still a huge kind of societal stigma around ageing, and the focus is very much on youth," which can lead to "ageist attitudes in society."

Reclaiming Self-Worth and Purpose

Midlife can be a time of reflection and reassessment. Women may experience a sense of crisis as they evaluate their past and future. To reclaim self-worth, it is essential to focus on personal health and well-being, set new goals, and engage in activities that bring joy. Embracing strength over traditional beauty standards and connecting with personal values can foster a renewed sense of purpose. Dr Momotaj says to "take on new roles and challenges, new goals. Kind of think about the things you've always wanted to do."

Building Stronger Support Networks

Menopause can be isolating, but building a strong support network is crucial. Engaging with others, whether through social groups or activities like menopause cafes, can provide validation and reduce loneliness. It is important to communicate openly with partners and family about the changes experienced during menopause to foster understanding and support. As Dr Momotaj puts it, "if we don't share with them, they won't know what we're going through."

Embracing Midlife as a Time of Growth

Viewing menopause as an opportunity for growth can transform the experience. Self-compassion and a positive outlook on ageing can alleviate the challenges associated with this transition. Embracing midlife as a chance to declutter life, set boundaries, and prioritise personal needs can lead to a fulfilling and balanced life. "Reminding yourself that ageing is a privilege... Gratitude is so important," Dr Momotaj notes us.

Conclusion

Menopause is a transitional phase that offers an opportunity for self-discovery and reinvention. By prioritising personal needs and embracing the changes that come with ageing, women can navigate this stage with confidence and resilience. It is a time to focus on what truly matters and to live life on one's own terms.